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  • A Changed Life

    Posted on February 25th, 2010 lula 1 comment

    By Lula Adams

    Jeni’s reality once included cutting on her legs with a sharp razor blade on a regular basis.

    “It felt like this physical pain took my mind off the emotional pain. One type of pain was manageable; the emotional pain was not manageable.” But neither cutting, nor drugs, nor alcohol, nor counseling sessions could permanently drive away the emotional pain.

    Jeni is an intelligent, vivacious, lovable young woman with a happy outlook on life. She loves being in love with Jesus.

    Jeni is an intelligent, vivacious, lovable young woman with a happy outlook on life. She loves being in love with Jesus.

    Jeni grew up without knowing God.

    Jeni once liked using sarcasms because she felt smarter as she waited for others to catch up with the joke. Five years ago she worked as a waitress in a restaurant. As Easter approached, she decided to mock Christians. Almost every customer endured her routine.

    “Why do you call it “Good” Friday? Wasn’t your Lord and Savior crucified and died on “Good” Friday?” she queried with her mocking tone. “I’m pretty sure if Jesus was back in his day planner, it wasn’t such a “good” Friday!”

    One woman, Ellen, decided to respond to Jeni’s questions by comparing Jesus’ suffering on the cross to the pain of childbirth. Jeni crouched at the table for 1 1/2 hours, just listening. Surprisingly, Jeni’s section was empty except for Ellen, her husband, and her daughter.

    On Easter Sunday, Ellen showed up at the restaurant with a new Bible. Jeni thanked her.

    Oh, this lady thinks this is going to change my life or something… not a good use for her money, Jeni thought.

    She took the Bible home in her pack and laid it by the door of her bedroom before she drank herself to sleep.

    She was still hung over in the morning after finishing her latest dark book that included witchcraft and spells. Jeni did not want to get out of bed. The pain that the people suffered in that book fit her idea of life… it was horrible.

    Loud and clear, she heard, ALL SIGNS POINT TO JESUS! Those words did not originate in her mind or mouth. She suddenly felt scared. She never thought the Jesus she mocked could actually be real.

    She looked over at the door, at the bag with the Bible. “Well, what the hell, you can’t screw up my life any worse than I already have.”

    She started reading the first chapter in the Gospel of John, “In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was God… and the Word became flesh.”

    No one ever told her that Jesus was God in the flesh!

    She continued to read in chapter 3, “God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten son and whoever believes in Him will have eternal life.”

    Jesus was talking to her, saying those works to her as she read the Bible.

    This revelation of God’s wonderful love surprised her. God’s presence filled the room. He was holy and pure, and she was not. She began to cry, a deep cry from her heart as she never cried before. She no longer wanted to live the same old life as before, causing others hurt and pain.

    “Kill me or change me,” she cried.

    Instead of a lightning bolt coming through the window and striking her dead, God changed Jeni with His love and forgiveness. Hope filled her heart.

    “I can tell Him all of my secrets and my deep dark things that I try to hide from everybody else.”

    She knew everything would be different from that day forward. She felt clean and changed. Her new birth, her salvation cost Jesus the torture of crucifixion and death.

    Jeni’s life changed dramatically when she encountered God. Diagnosed with borderline personality disorder, an incurable condition, she no longer had any of the symptoms. She had taken 6 prescribed drugs: an anti-psychotic for cutting, one for panic attacks, another for depression, one for migraines, one for allergies, and one for possible petit mall seizures. She stopped taking the anti-psychotic drug immediately. The day she met Jesus, she no longer even wanted to cut herself. All the “craziness” was gone. She weaned herself from all the other medications within 2 months.

    Some dreams of a demonic presence troubled her for a few months after her salvation. In the dreams, she claimed to belong to Jesus, and the evil presence left her.

    Jeni became uncomfortable with her live-in boyfriend, so she chose to marry him about a month after she found Jesus.

    It took a little longer for Jeni to stop the alcohol even though she never drank every day. Sometimes she would dump out a bottle determined to quit, but then she bought a new one. Her struggle to quit ended when she discovered she was pregnant with her daughter six months later.

    Who knew? The Creator of everything could know her and love her. She wondered at God’s amazing grace!

    When Jeni discovered Holy Spirit’s power, her life changed again. A friend prayed for her to receive the gift of tongues. Her leg started shaking and she spoke in another language. She felt God’s overwhelming power causing her to speak in tongues, yet she knew she also had control. After this encounter she heard God’s voice with more clarity.

    Jeni enjoys being in love with Jesus. She can relate to hurting people and help them find hope. She knew darkness and cynicism. Now she knows joy and love in the Holy Spirit.

    Many people say Jeni’s face shines when she worships God. I agree. I call her amazing Jeni.

    Many people say Jeni’s face shines when she worships God. I agree. I call her amazing Jeni.

    You can find a new life with Jesus too. God loves you so much that He was willing to suffer torture and death on a cross for you. You can be clean and free. Good Friday can be “good” for you, too. After His death, He arose from the grave showing He conquered death. Christians celebrate Jesus’ victory over death on Easter Sunday. Ask Jesus to reveal the truth to you. Get a Bible and read the Gospel of John. Find Jesus and follow Him. He is very near.

    You will never be the same!


    1 responses to “A Changed Life” RSS icon

    • Jeni,
      You are an amazing women of God. You radiate the Kingdom of God through your life. Thank you for sharing your testimony. You are so brave.

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